Friday, June 22, 2012


Last night at work I was harassed for my sexual orientation by the Duty Manager at work.

This same man has been eager to know all of the news, developments and everything that isn't his business about my relationship with another woman (who happens to be a workmate as well). He's gay too, so I can understand his curiosity but he's far from professional about it.

This was happening last night, right up until 10pm when it's time to go home - and then he promptly abuses me for "wanting to sign out at the same time as [her]".

Excuse me, but I can want what I like. I didn't ask to sign out at the same time as her (she works a different shift to me anyway), and I wouldn't expect to be allowed to leave at the same time as her. 

 And FYI, this guy had no problem in encouraging her to leave within 10 minutes of me last week and said nothing when she waited up for me last night. (Why he kept her until 10pm when she starts at noon is beyond me, especially when there were other people who started earlier and could have replaced her in the kitchen when she left)

Earlier in the evening after she signed out he asked me "where's the party at tonight?" and I said it was "probably happening without me" - which I didn't get to clarify but he interpreted as something to do with my girlfriend.  In fact, the party I was missing out on was my regular Friday night Pathfinder RPG session with my flatmate and friends.

He also said "she's signed out, sorry" in a very insincere tone. I told him I knew she'd signed out. (She said goodbye to me when she left. Derr.)

He also called me a "freak" - and while I don't know his thought process behind why he said it, the tone was nasty and I may be bisexual or queer, I'm not a freak.

I privately think he's a douchebag, but also that he was taking out his inept managerial skills on me.  I had a complaint from a customer about the behaviour of the bouncer (checking the IDs of the man's underage sons) and I referred the customer to the manager.  The manager's body language (I didn't hear the dialogue, just observed the interaction) was awkward: he was polishing a glass, not making eye contact with the customer and generally getting walked all over.

But whatever, the bouncer was doing his job, customer should lump it but to his face we'd apologise. Yay, another day in customer service.

But to turn around and bully me?  Not fucking on, mate. 

So, if he does it again, I'm taking it to the big boss. He's already bullied one of our staff members into leaving, but I like my job and I don't think it's ok for him to get in between me and my girlfriend.

Ok, rant done.


Thursday, April 26, 2012

violence against women in high fantasy art

The so called "Triumph of Ferocity".
This image has sparked off a debate among players of Magic: The Gathering, some of whom include my friends and acquaintances. It shows a provocatively dressed woman (Liliana Vess) being pinned down by the throat be a hulking man (Garruk) who is about to punch her in the face.

In the story, (the story is extremely important to M:TG fans and the issue of violence against women is hard to separate from the story) Liliana is pretty damn evil, has killed lots of people and has put a terrible curse on Garruk. He's out for revenge.

Does she deserve to be killed? (Does she deserve to be punished?)

Personally, I'd say she deserves to be punished, but not killed.

I've seen people question the sexualisation of the image (ok, wow, are you missing the heaving bosoms, his-knee-between-her-legs and suspenders?), question the "rapey"-ness of it, question thoughtfully (hard to tell with this guy, tbh) can it be depicted in another way and if not, what does that mean for female characters in these franchises...

What the hell is wrong with fantasy art? What's so wrong about fantasy art?

On one hand, there is so fucking much wrong with fantasy art and it's depiction of women and men. And the violence.
But hell, it's fantasy! It's not real!
I guess my umbrage is when you get fans of fantasy art talking about women they don't like as "whores" and "bitches". And when they trivialise the fact that violence against women (glowing spells not required) is a REAL WORLD problem and they're perpetuating rape culture by consuming and validating artwork and themes like the Triumph of Ferocity.

And man, it really fucks me off when they mansplain me and ask me enormous questions that boil down to changing all of rape culture right now. God damn it, I'm just trying to change YOUR mind.